Daily Archives: 2018年10月17日

Back to Edinburgh

Posted by admin on 2018年10月17日コメントを受け付けていません。

（和文は英文の後につけます）
I was in Edinburgh last week. A duty for an EU project brought me back to the city after eighteen years of absence. It was the place I spent three years for my Ph.D. from 1992 to 1995. Only once I came back briefly there for another duty in 2000. I was excited when the travel was confirmed a month ago, but only found, when I arrived, that I had never been happy whenever I was back there. Not just for the bad weather, but the city had been a place for work, hardship, and agony to me. It was certainly one of the most difficult periods with no future prospect but hard work.

I could take a walk around the city from time to time and could visit sites which I use to walk around including the places we lived. The appearance was fairly different, especially shops, but the city was somehow recognizable. It was embarassing that I felt at home but my sight continuously upset me. No wonder that I was confused by scenes as I had been away for almost twenty years.

On the very last night, one of my old friends kindly invited me to go to a concert. St. Cecilia’s hall had been a venue for concerts while I had been in Edinburgh, where I had seen many kind people, who loved early music. I found my family there as ever through the concert. Nothing changes in music. I realized that music was my home and that I had been supported by these people in spirit. I remembered that it was the place where I gave a birth to myself in spirit.

I remembered who I was through this visit to Edinburgh. I thanked people who had helped me to go through the difficult time. I was so glad that I could see old friends despite the fact that I had been away so long. They welcomed me as ever. I understood why I had been hooked to Parable of the Prodigal Son and kept a print depicting the scene by Rembrandt in my office. It certainly depicts me.

先週、Edinburgh に行ってきた。Euのとあるプロジェクトに助言者として参加している関係上、会議に招かれた。18年ぶりに再訪した。この町には1992年から3年間、博士課程で学ぶため滞在していた。なので馴染みの場所なのだが当然のことながら店舗などが完全に入れ替わっていて、歩いていて頭が混乱する。よく知っている通りのはずなのに光景が一変しているから。会議の合間に思い出の場所を再訪したが、本質的にはあまりかわっていなかった。食事が不味いこととか。懐かしくはあるがうれしくはないような複雑な気分だった。Edinburghにいるときは苦学生だったから苦しい思い出が大半である。心の支えが音楽だった。最後の日、通い慣れたコンサートに誘われてチェンバロ2台による演奏を聴いた。バッハ、クープラン、ラモーといった組み合わせだった。美しい音楽を聴きながら聴衆を端から端まで見ていった。見た覚えのある顔がいくつかあった。このコミュニティのお蔭で3年間の学生生活を乗り切れたのだと思う。20年ぶりにも関わらず自分のことを憶えていてくれた人もいて、挨拶を交わした。私は自らの魂をここで作り直した。そのことを思い出した。放蕩息子を暖かく迎えてくれた彼らに感謝した。